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The remedy to comparison and feeling like everyone else has it figured out but you.

 

 

Nov 21, 2022

Over the last couple of episodes, we’ve discussed the upcoming holidays and the pressure to have holiday feelings and do holiday things and meet holiday expectations. But that pressure can sabotage our mental health and our time with family and friends. So it’s important that we figure out what we want and need from the holidays, which is key to enjoying this time of year to the fullest. 

In this episode, I share an exercise that can help us tap into the “joy juice,” the feel-good emotions that we want to be feeling this time of year. It can help us clarify what we want for ourselves and the tone we want our holidays to take. The exercise gives us a way to visualize our holidays—to do a virtual walkthrough, like daydreaming or watching a movie—so that we can learn what we want our desired holiday to feel like and be like in reality. Here are the basic steps:

  • Sit quietly and think about how you want to feel (let’s say, on Thanksgiving)
  • List the words that describe those feelings (e.g., warm, joyful, connected)
  • Picture yourself walking through the day while keeping those words top of mind
  • Let your body feel your desired emotional tone and intention for the day
  • Try to anticipate things you want to prevent and encourage emotions that you want to create

The great thing about this exercise is that it can be used ahead of any upcoming experience. It’s been shown to be effective, not just for the holidays, but for any event or situation where visualizing the narrative can help you navigate potential pitfalls and produce a more positive experience. Let me know how it goes! 

Finally, as you’re setting your tone and intentions, be aware of the language around the commoditization of the holidays. Shopping is not therapy. An outsized focus on buying and getting and giving can sabotage us, too. Gifts can bring joy and delight, but things cannot bring real happiness. 

As always, feel free to reach out with questions, comments, or experiences that you want to share. If you liked this episode, please rate, review, and subscribe to the podcast. Your feedback helps me increase the value of the program for you and makes it easier for other listeners to find us.

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